the rains come

5.9.24

soak me, i needed this storm
i need to feel the thunder in my chest
slow and deep
to hear the steady beat of drops on the window, they square
the drums in my headphones, the dreams in my head
a multiplication of hope: i believe again

my sister’s gentle hands smooth coconut oil into my back,
i can’t reach it on my own
and something settles back within me

my best friend once asked why i write so much in passive voice
i think because sometimes i need truth to be told to my body
from outside this tangled head of worry
the village is still raising me
and rise i will

the rains come often this week, to remind us that
everything changes, but life will live on and to
give my beans in the garden patch what they need to 
bloom when the last sun comes to
touch us again
and to lift the scent of the roses higher
to prepare us for winter

the rains come and still i have not been paid
the pain comes and still some choose not to honour me lately
it’s a lot on my mind
but i mourn
their loss of love’s spirit more
than my loss of them
and pray it finds them again
the blood comes with new moon once more and
wisdom washes my eyes out 

i am learning i am learning 
and the words pour on me
my incense is burning
and the rains call me
it is all turning
as we find the strength
we are yearning for life
for the first time or again
and i believe we will find it
our kind of life that fights 
for truth and light